| UAL B-727 trip to Chicago from BUF) "Blue Spot," ala Steve Martin: Airline Second Officer, Jeff, comes in from outside preflight and "grouses" because it's nowv time for his least favorite regime of flying as a cockpit crewmember--radio and paperwork. (What has he been doing and what is he about to do?). For a paltry $3.49, you may buy the continuation of this trip to Chicago complete with many additional scenes and explanations of procedures to know just what in hell we're talking about (all that joking around and airline jargon) and, later, serious actual flying (taxi, takeoff, enroute and landing). It's fun, entertaining and interesting and--only $3.49 here at FreeIQ. Of course, the free one here is just that--free forever. Tell and/or send the URL to your friends. They'll love you for it. We're getting a lot of play and the fun we had on this particular trip shows. Copy and send the URL: www.FreeIQ/JimGives. Here's what my good friend does: He copies and pastes URLs to his Notepad. He names it "JimGives--airline stuff" and puts the file in his Documents. Then, he'll open it and ad to it--stuff like questions he want's to ask Captain Jim, airline and airplane jokes he sees here or anywhere. When you buy "Airline/Airplane Continuation," you'll get all the answers to the questions here, your own questions answered and those of thousands of others who have asked Captain Jim. How did they happen to ask so many questions? He'll explain. Check out the "paid product" continuation video. What you see for free here: Second officer, Jeff (last names are omitted to protect the innocent), arrives in the cockpit after his "walkaround" preflight (what does he do out there, anyway? We call it "kicking the tires," but we're about to "light the fires"). He facetiously seems a bit dejected because now he must accomplish lots of radio work and paperwork to get this "rocket" off the ground properly (what does he do exactly?). Captain Jim narrates and is allowing the co-pilot (First Officer, Dave) to fly the next "leg." He counters with defining exactly what "his leg really is" (a little jocularity, just the kind of thing that keeps us all sane and relaxed when accomplishing the same things day in and day out when flying). The next leg for Dave to fly is BUF to ORD (Buffalo to Chicago's O'Hare Airport). (Why "ORD," when BUF denotes the town name pretty well?). OK, ready to learn a little? Drop down to the bottom for the answers to some of your questions, at least, where Capt. Jim gives your "gratis answers." "Flying fingers" commence. Jeff must check the system warning lights, horns, buzzers, clackers, etc. to be sure they work properly before each flight. He goes at it deftly and with some hilarity. (Just what is he checking there? What are those systems and what goes "on or off" when and if they malfunction?). Lots of answers to these questions in the paid version, plus interaction with flight attendants and "jump seaters." I know, you can't resist checking it out, can you? OK, you shouldn't, at any rate. Engine Start: You may notice that #3 engine is already running. (there are only three on a 727, of which you may already be aware. There are three pilots (Jeff is the "junior" member of the cockpit crew and is just waiting for seniority to move up to 1st Officer and eventually Captain). Most airliners now only have only two pilots, as many of the systems Jeff operates "today" are automated in "state of the art" machines. We are starting #2 engine (notice the N2 guage in the middle row of engine instruments--fourth down from the top. We introduce fuel at 20% N2 and release the hydraulically operated/electrically actuated starter switch at 35%. (These are the kinds of explanations we give you for the $3.49 "tour"). You watch as #1 is started. We already have the "salute" from the ground mechanic or "tractor operator," who may have pushed us back from the gate. So we can get clearance from ground control and then taxi at will. After a bit of audio and visual "noise," you'll watch take off procedures and a little of the enroute "leg" here. The tour continues on FreeIQ, though it'll cost you that very reasonable (expense-covering) fee. (I'll probably have to share with Dave and Jeff when they see this). So go for it now. We've all lost a lot of pay and retirement benefits recently, so you may feel sorry for us (or not), but I promise you some of it will go for help to airline employees more hurt by recent "cuts" (read: unconscionable "slashes" of pay and retiree benes by what we feel are airline executives, certain judges and even current administrations; sorry, but you'll never convince us otherwise, but we won't go there here any more right now, except to say, "It is no secret that UAL's president and certain executives and board members have taken hundreds of millions of "bonuses" and stock options to affect this and other airlines' "savings." Take from labor and give to management. Hmm. OK, no more politics here. Let's have fun and fageddaboudit. (I think not--the latter!). Back to selling: (What are A-pumps? Got questions. Ah yes, your paltry $3.49 (use PayPal, if you wish), also includes personalized question-answering by our "professional aircrew." You pay, we answer your questions. One great answer to a question we got recently (for which you will get much more value than your $3.49 for in laughter) is: What are all those land circles in the nation's bread basket down there? What caused them and why are some green and some brown? You have aviation questions; (I won't say, "we have answers," because that's entirely too trite, but we do). Some answers to posed questions above: 1. "Blue Spot." Simply, it was a Steve Martin "bit" joke that he made when he was "frustrated" by a spotlight operator: "All I wanted was a blue spot!." I do not recall who put the blue "pricetag sticker" on the captain's yoke. It could have been Jeff or Dave, but it may have been something we commented on for most of the flight from time to time--just to be silly, I guess. 2. When Dave points to his leg, he's only being a little facetious when I mention that it will be "his leg"--that he will fly the next segment from Buffalo to Chicago's O'Hare airport (BUF-ORD). Something you may not have known: "ORD" was so named because the original airport N. W. of the city was originally called, "Orchard Airport." Y'think it was once an orchard? (You'd be correct). 3. Before Jeff comes in from "kicking the tires," he has still performed lots of radio and paperwork: He's gotten a copy of the flight plan, so he can tell the flight attendants flight time and planned ETA, number of passengers (pax), planned altitude and special stuff he may have learned from customer service or on radio from the "load planner," like possible armed skymarshals, passenger oxygen needed, etc. Outside, he visually checks hundreds of items from wingtips to nose cone to gear wells to tail and wing control surfaces; other stuff like hydraulic pressure guages, tire pressures, navigation lights, beacons--specifically too many items to mention here right now--maybe later if you ask and really want to know. Why wouldn't he check the strobe lights at this time? Ask. What are, how many and what voltage are the vortex generators? He knows that stuff. So will you, if you care. 4. Why do we joke around a lot? Shouldn't we have been much more serious, with the lives of over a hundred folks in the back? Aren't we being just a little too "casual," laughing a lot like we did, making stupid remarks, wearing silly sunglasses, etc.? Well, maybe. It is true that most flights are not necessarily operated with this much "fun" going on. Many pilots are much more serious and may well disdain the actions of this particular flight. But, it is simply true that the Captain sets the tone of how he wants his crew to cooperate and perform their duties. Capt. Jim's attitude was that, to absolutely get the most cooperation at all times and regimes of flight, that he keep the crew "in-synch" by allowing them to express themselves--something you cannot deny was being accomplished. When a tense moment should arise, as they seldom but insidiously do occur, he wanted to be sure his crew would not hesitate to speak their mind--feel free to keep an open mind, report and suggest. The captain's job is to manage his crew so he gets the very best information at all times. Some "Captain Queeg"-types have been known to upset their crews to the extent that when something happens, they simply "sit on their hands," as instructed. This is never good when it's time to get all the information from every source in order to make an informed decision. Believe me, a little jocularity cannot hurt. We are obviously a "happy bunch" here. The same goes for the cabin crew. It would not be good to get a cold meal from the back, no coffee or soft drink when thirsty--especially no information about what's going on back there when a situation arises. A good captain goes back before he sits up front. He introduces himself and invites flight attendants to "come on up" for a break occasionally (there are rules about when it's appropriate). It works, they do and they are easy to get along with because of it. Keep tuned. You will be amazed at the stuff you never knew about airline/airplane operations. If you want to be "reminded" (oh gee, do I really? More spam? More e-mails?), send me your e-mail address and I'll add you to the database. You'll get a lot of free stuff, bloggy stuff, info--some good, maybe some a bit boring. Opt out anytime the same way. Put "add me" or anything similar in the subject and send to: JimGives@gmail.com. Soon, we'll have a format to fill out that may be easier to navigate, but don't wait. Sign up now. We're only looking at one e-mail reminder/blog every couple of weeks or so. Free stuff. Fun stuff. Do it! PayPal and credit cards accepted soon (easier) soon. Meanwhile, send PayPal payment of $3.49 for your lifetime, inaugural, charter membership. Price is subject to increase as popularity increases. You will get a password that will always give you free stuff that others will pay more for. It's like having a lifetime membership to the Red Carpet Club. JimGives@gmail.com www.FreeIQ.com/jimgives |
